By Zethu Zwane
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Welcome back to another series on why Affirmations are bad for you. In today’s part 3, I go a little deeper into why there’s some things we’re still not giving to God. Some beliefs are hidden to us and that’s how they become idols of the heart. Some beliefs are know, but we don’t want to address them. Read part 1 and part 2 so that you get the full essence of what I’ve unfolded and laid out in this latest series on idols and affirmations and your relationship in Christ.
I was walking past my friends when I heard one of them talking about the mixing of beliefs. She says the witch doctor can’t cure him because he’s like so many people mixing too many beliefs. I want you to take that in for a moment when reading this series. And ask yourself by using affirmations, have you just opened up a world you don’t fully understand it’s magnitude. Remember the difference between affirmations is old lies updated to a new sheep’s skin
I remember when I first embarked on this journey I was probably like several others who’ve experienced unimaginably struggles in their lives. There are certain things you just don’t imagine happening in your life. Like marrying a spouse who ends up with cancer. Then they die, leaving you alone with the scars and responsibilities. The responsibility of the children and unpaid medical bills that feel like they’re drowning you each day.
That moment of pain was mine. I kept thinking no one will remember this pain, but me. I kept writing how everyone will forget, but I will have to live with the scars. Wouldn’t you agree there have been moments in your Christian journey where you didn’t bring certain struggles to God. When time passes, you soon forget that you have a list of things that you didn’t lay at the cross.
Instead you’ve taken them on and alone believing this is part of your journey. I hop this next series will help you see the problems with hiding your pain from God. Sometimes we keep treating God similar to family or friends. Regardless of how fervent your praise or prayer, there’s always a season of recognizing that I battled these moments without God.
Partially those moments are also those unique spaces where God will show you your battle. What are you up against right now that you’re believing to take on alone as opposed to taking it to the cross? In fact the struggle is learning to move away from people’s reactions because family and friends can get tired of your struggle. After struggling to understand this, I absolutely agree that we put too much on each other.
Sometimes we Place God on Conditions Based on our Views of Life
Many of us have conditional relationships where in order to be your friend I need to support you on the same level as God. Now I want to say whether you recognize or know that you have a terms and conditions with friends or any relationship, chances are you do. I will forever say we’re surrounded by the illusion of what friends are or what dating is. It’s hard not to have a contract of expectations when you have relationships. Yet the exposure of the accident at home, made me rethink all these relationships.
What I have found from many disappointments, we cannot make humans gods. I’m still learning what it means to have Godly friendships where my people are free from saving me from what God is designed to do. God enjoys and yearns to be your saviour, and so I looked at how even accidents or struggles turned my friends into idols. I certainly didn’t like it when I was idolized as the strong friend, but I never acknowledged how I idolized and set unrealistic expectations with friends. The totality of these moments and chasing after laws of attraction created a lot of nights where I couldn’t sleep because I now wanted answers. How can we remove idols from your eyes and heart by learning to seek God first above all.
As a result, how can we help each other to turn more often than ever to God. How can we help each other build relationships where if I’m feeling down, I ask my friends to pray with me. I do not need to say what has happened, but through prayer we’ve woven a stronger bond in anchoring our worries and hopes onto God. In the journey to recovery (I’m still recovering) I wanted to learn how to remove idols in my life, and how to continually come to the cross. I believe this practice would free those I love from the pressure of delivering healing only Jesus Christ can provide.
Fighting with Loved Ones Lead to Seeing My Idols
There was a lot of fighting due to one painful season. During highly emotional seasons, a lot of us begin to clean house. Suddenly the people you always laughed with go under evaluation; do you care enough for me during the highs and lows of my life. I’ve always been taunted by this question because I went through a tragedy as a child. What was clear in elementary school was how the adults in the room wanted to save themselves more than save a child. I know how it feels when adults lie because they lied and said I received counselling. That is not true because again I watched adults protect a building instead of a child.
I remember adults lying to justify why children like me end up like this because of a billion reasons. I’ve told you the story before and I said it in my book on body confidence. The adults labelled me as unruly drop out in Eswatini. I guess at the time the conclusion is soon-to-be-dropouts don’t deserve love. Ironically my outspoken nature was well received when I received a full scholarship to study. Yet there is no boarder that you can cross to escape labels. We’ve all been called something good and something bad in our lives.
In my body confidence series, I always emphasize that there’ll always be labels shoved on you. That’s the reason why at the time I thought to myself that’s why they never believed I was worthy of counselling. I understand wholeheartedly the pains of rejection and the labels that follow. Yet coming full circle from those unimaginable moments, I realized how it created idols. These idols I believed in couldn’t be laid on the cross because they were sensitive areas. I also believe this is where laws of attraction deceive and lie to you. As opposed to freeing you, they shackle you in further lies outlined in Isiah, Jeremiah and other pivotal chapters of the bible.
PAIN AS MEMORABLE MESSAGES
My family lived those moments not you. My family remembers those moments not you. Isn’t that how you feel about loosing your job. Sometimes you feel you’re standing alone, and your family doesn’t get it. How could they not get it. How painful are those moments. Isn’t that how you feel when your boyfriend left you for another woman? A billion stories like this are everywhere, but they all point to similar feelings.
None of us like the unfamiliar or uncertain. Especially in severe cases like when you’re left homeless. My friend and I were talking about it; how can you work 3 jobs and still be living with your parents? A whole generation of adults are living with their parents due to increased standards of living. I listened to a young man ask his mom for more money. You could tell he was unhappy because the societal norm is the man should provide for his mother.
I’m not a man, but can’t you relate to those feelings that at some point in your life, you should have made it. I don’t know what is about humans, but we like a good story, and the story to be consistently happy. You should have a house, be married or have a thriving career. Moments like this lead to unspoken or spoken resentment.
Sometimes you don’t give something to God because there’s too much resentment and disappointment. Chances are some of you have played out the ending longer than listening to God’s voice, so you end up far more disappointed than anticipated. The lack of preparedness to wait is the actual danger facing this present generation. That’s because we see fast everything and everywhere. What’s ironic I got the chance to witness one of the most successful family’s habits.
You’re lacking a Willingness to Test the Narrative
They work all the way to 2a.m. only to wake up at 5a.m to get the children ready for school. Even after watching them and seeing the fruits of their labour, I believed in the fast success because we’re surrounded by it. I hoped in the fast recovery because pain doesn’t get the Instragm post. It’s uncomfortable, yet it’s the uncomfortable that opens your eyes to growth.
It’s the painful that moves us away from idols into Gods hands. Wait- I lie because I see several people still digging deeper into idols even when it’s failing. In many ways, we too choose to struggle chasing after idols of the heart like Gods children did for 400 years. Keep reading to understand why God holds back on certain things. Not because He’s looking to spite you, but if you never let go of your idols, you will cement the idea of it being your saving grace.
For example if you believe a boyfriend is your world, you will struggle in certain areas in order for you to learn that boyfriends should not be gods. Stop placing high expectations on a man, and begin seeking God to define your relationships. Similarly if you worship your workplace as the door to your car and house, then struggle or growth opportunities that Jesus is the only door no man can shut.
Catching Your Idols is a Constant Journey of Turning back to God
Then there is something mentioned from part 2: parental beliefs, societal beliefs and friendship beliefs. We live them out every day, and at times without knowing they’re in competition with God’s kingdom practices. I always underestimate how convincing I am. So when I convinced my friend groups about the law of attraction we were all sold. I honestly regret it. Especially as I see no difference between law of attraction and witchcraft. I feel even more sad for countries where the idea of the devil has been water washed.
It’s as though people have grown accustomed to seeing those ads about tarot card readings without remembering there is an evil working against the Kingdom of God. The only true Aleph. Lastly it’s not easy for me to say this testimony. I ignored it for 2 years. I wanted cool testimonies related to my idol; a trophy career. I rolled my eyes at cult churches like in part 1. Yet now I was basically the same as the person who sat with a baboon in a hut. Instead I chose a different no name brand with lively theatrics. It’s the difference between physical idols and idols of the heart. I believe the law of attraction plays on your hearts idols.
Are You Being Honest About Your Feelings?
Has there been a part of your Christian journey that has demonized resentment and anger? If so how does it explain God’s appreciation when we lament to Him? There is a story about Hannah where Jehovah El Rio didn’t answer her prayers because she wasn’t saying what’s really breaking her heart. God only answered once she gave Him what she had been holding back.
Similarly I can cry about being plus size, and hide the shame being plus size makes me feel from God. Yes that is something I need God’s help, but the deeper reason is I don’t feel loved. God sometimes doesn’t answer the surface level prayer like “God help me loose weight,” because you’re not addressing God I don’t feel worthy.” Fixating on your weight doesn’t prevent you from feeling abandoned. How easy is it to say “God I feel abandoned and not worthy of love,” without gaslighting your own body experience.
More so Jesus doesn’t give you the marriage now until you first learn how you’ll end up fighting with your spouse due to abandonment issues. He won’t give you the promotion until you see the difference between a leader and a manger. He won’t give the business until you understand your position in freeing people from suffering.
Idols Prevent you From Seeing God’s Heart
God’s heart yearns to save His people from struggling, but will you help Him? Will you stand away from the trophies of the unicorn business to be a business for God. That’s because once you remove those idols your heart will see how God wants you to solve income inequality.
Opposed to this is law of attraction that completely removes Yahweh’s place as sovereign ruler and sole provider to all mankind. God is searching for the person within you who will bow to Him before many nations and bow to Him before any idol. As a result I wholeheartedly warn against the light practicing of affirmations without fully studying God’s Kingdom practices.
I need to Make a point on Playing the Hot Potatoe Game
I’m going to brazen for a moment as a way to encourage your response to all this. I would like to ask for your consideration because I believe you’ll agree. Pornography and law of attraction are the same. What If someone is waiting to have sex after getting married. Yet they also start watching porn because some magazine said it’s healthy. Or like many Christians do is date, have sex, but still pray for a marriage ordained by God.
When I look at this from a carnal perspective I even hate saying it. Reason being a small voice in my head says don’t judge people for sinning different to you. However this again misses the essence of why God calls you to remain pure till marriage. It’s also taking on parts of Gods Kingdom practices while living for the world, and in your boyfriend’s house.
Similarly there’s a section of affirmations that says write a person’s name in a circle. Write all you want from that person to do like “is devoted only to me,” and it will happen. This sounds like a spell. I want to ask you this question: is that person still practicing purity when they watch porn? And are they honestly believing in Jesus Christ when they write down a series of fortune telling words. Are they believing in God for a Godly husband when they’re living with their boyfriend?
Did You Get rid of the Idol, or Did You Just Redefine it?
Because that’s what you’re doing when listing affirmations. You say you’re pure, but watch porn. You’ve attested to your faith, but are living with your boyfriend. You’ve stopped worshipping your workplace, but still love money and the life it brings. Apparently we’ve consoled ourselves by removing parts of affirmations to make it Christian. It disguises the fact you’re worshipping a foreign spirit, and it’s also the reason why I resent “this is a sign,” post. I believe if I read a post with a verse that touched my spirit then I wouldn’t need a subtext telling me this is a sign. The power and authority of God’s voice doesn’t need help to show signs and wonders.
Yet when I was moving away from affirmations, I also felt like a recovering addict because parts of my spirit was becoming hardwired to signs. Likewise, to how my nature was hardwired to certain idols. How can we as Christians then free ourselves from falsehoods, so we can be full living testimonies for others? How far are we willing to deny that both are evil. Yes, we all fall into sin and lust is one of them; However, mistakenly worshipping a false idol is another. It’s one you need to run faster away from. It’s one you need to learn to discern.
In the end we all have idols; idols of the heart and idols of the eyes. Yet blatantly worshipping a false spirit is falling into the devil’s trap. Similar to when the snake asked Adam and Eve a question that blurs the meaning. What is the difference between Aleph and universe. Again, you’ve decided you won’t go for tarot card readings, but you’ll read astrological signs. You won’t sit next to a baboon in a hut, but you will write circles of affirmations. You see in the God Kingdom, Yahweh has explicitly said what is detestable. I even challenge you to say Paul was far better when he killed Christians compared to Jews who decided to pray to every idol under the heavens. That’s because he quickly turned from his ways, but the Jews persisted for over 400 years.
Your circle of People Determines your known and Unknown Idols
Moving to a different area of your life that also influences your beliefs and emotions, your friend circle. Specifically coupling a lack of healing, lack of church going, lack of therapy and self-evaluation could lead down the wrong path. I definitely believe we all need therapy because there’s thousands if not millions of people sitting in church who are anchored in an idol. They have the biggest expression of faith, give freely and live true Christian lives, but are limited by some kind of idol. It’s not enough to search yourself; I’d love to motivate you to seek counselling in order to reveal hidden idols,
I say this because our circle of people can be harming us in ways you’re not aware. I included this in my dating series on Part 3 on Youtube about how the women I met created such a damaging image. I have been single longer than the Sahara desert and when people finally thought I met the right guy I noticed how it eventually caused harm. I’d love for you to hear the full scope of the story to see how it related to idols of the hearts.
Nonetheless the advise from your loved ones can also magnify an idol. Do you think that when women come together to conspire on how to make him jealous you’ve somehow turned him into an idol? Weird right, but now your whole entire day is fixated on him. It’s difficult to move on if you believe you’ve jut lost your soul mate. Although there’s affirmations for finding a soul mate, there’s a far powerful reason God has designed purity to be your longest waiting season.
Waiting Seasons Are The Most Undervalued Growth Opportunities
In waiting you can learn wisdom and unconditional love, yet many have dropped this lesson entirely by dating. Remember in the introduction I said we all enter relationship with some kind of contract; consequently ask yourself why Gods planned for you to wait. It may not be dating, it could be loosing weight or even that job promotion.
If you have found him, there’s also affirmations on how to confirm it. Being around women who believe in affirmations could led you to following that path. Or thy ma Once more this is endorsing beliefs without testing it biblical truths. This is following a lifestyle that ignores your emotional history of abandonment. Honestly ask yourself whether you affirmations are driven by healing or driven by feelings of rejection. I mean why did he reject you?
Yet again by doing affirmations you’re putting your hope in both the devil and God because who is the universe? God and the universe are not equal. Conversely why is this not in the Bible? Remember in Numbers it said that God is not a man that he should lie. As a result the Bible holds all the wisdom you need, yet affirmations imply there’s something Yahweh withheld from you. So which one it; did the Bible lie or did God lie? Additionally is the Bible incomplete, and does that mean that Yahweh is not actually the Supreme ruler above all rulers of the heaven?
Identifying the Idols of Your Heart
Several women make love, dating and men the idols of their hearts. That’s because some women go to the extent of following him to work, knowing his whereabouts and tracking his phone. At my one job, I used to receive several calls from women wanting to know about the whereabouts of certain men.
Of course client privacy meant I couldn’t reply, but it does make you wonder the extend to which they were willing to go. I know my friends bought into financial security as being by your own strength. That was our idol whether you’d like to believe it or not. Essentially buying into a belief can lead to idolizing a certain lifestyle. However now believing you have to punish him for leaving you is destructive to both you and him.
A word of caution on dating is I’ve met men who completely turned off because I didn’t exude same behavior as a woman who would follow him around. Due to this I believe we’ve all been sold a lie about love, because many are seeking unrealistic standards. On the other hand, several women like myself idolize ambitious careers. That’s why I’d sleep at 4a.m., be at the bus at 5:45am all in the name of careers goals. And Jesus did an outstanding job at cleansing that one. It doesn’t mean I’m perfect and no longer idolize something. Absolutely not. Yet every time I got frustrated by a certain situation, I was almost good at catching that I’d created another idol.
Learning to Slow Down Your Life
You see your heart lies to you because you’ll pray thanking God for helping you spot a useless idol in your life. Then 1 year and 8 months later you might be like me when I discovered I had another idol. That’s when I realized the importance of stepping away from the rat race, and begin asking myself where is God in my plans.
Did I slapstick Jesus like I did in Part 2, or am I listening to societal beliefs. These moments are unavoidable, but how good are you at slowing the pace to fully listen to God’s voice? In those moments I was seriously annoyed with myself. I wanted to give up because I felt pathetic. I didn’t even want to pray because I was tired of doing things from my own strength. Yet that is exactly when you should be praying; recognizing that you’re not meant to battle these in your own strength.
What happens when that fear is mixed with a fear childhood. Those feelings of being abandoned became a nasty cocaine mix; I mean what do we have to fix here. Easy begin turning your eyes to God. Whenever you fel the urge or pressure to be ahead in life, turn to God. Whenever you feel you’re missing out on love, turn to God. The more you turn to God the easier it is to slow down. The only thing you should be quitting in your life is the rat race to success or marriage.
Hold Jesus Kingdom practices in your heart. This begins by reading the Bible, which does not lie or withhold information. I don’t want you to figure out who’s right, like I did. Refrain from the path of lies like laws of attraction. Convertly I know Yahweh plans are far superior than any other. I also know The Aleph holds plans that are only there to prosper you, unless of course you’re as stubborn and insist on believing in astrological signs and affirmations.
Unaddressed Uncertainty Leads to Mistrusting Jehovah Jireh
Going back full circle from part 1. How do you escape the feelings of pressure when you’re an adult living in your parent’s home. How do you escape the anxieties when you’re left homeless, but working 3 jobs. There’s a host of resources from therapist to priests to help you heal. A pastor is well versed on helping you learn about the the veils of your eyes. Now I know some of you may be like me who also couldn’t find a pastor. If that’s the case, ask your friends to help you find the right church for you. Chances are you’re overthinking who’ll best understand you. It’s not about who understands you, but about understanding God in order to create a new heart in you. Your current heart and mind is full of too many opinions, so I encourage you to practice patience when joining a church.
Then notice that if you’re still struggling to trust a church, notice those feelings are yours. Your feelings may be misleading you, so I encourage you to sit through a physical church. Not a zoom church or a YouTube church like I did. I encourage you to sit in a physical building, and allow patience to unfold. Feelings of distrust toward the church is one thing, but if you ignore it for long its becoming a foothold for the devil. I still love YouTube episodes, but I use them like magazines where they are just adding to the wisdom that the bible provides. they increase my attest to my lifestyle change to choosing God and advise me on how to better my relationship with God.
Finally I had plenty of moment where I wanted God to spoon feed me. Yet Pastor TD Jake’s said it most perfect when he said God created the tree, but man created the table, chairs and home with the tree. Likewise, the Bible is God’s revelations written down, but it’s yours to pick up and read. Prayer is the most powerful form of communication, but its yours to own. Similarly, faithful is God’s Character, but it’s yours to believe without seeing. So I implore you to be like the Centurion who believed Jesus would heal his servant without entering the House. The most valuable aspect I keep stating in this series is that Jesus gives you courage to go after healing. He called you brave, so you can learn to withstand against attacks, and discern false
There is a life ahead of you that’s exciting, peaceful and full of enjoyment. Jesus allows us to go through these temptations, so we we appreciate Him over all falsehoods. He walks you into the valley, so through it you can discover the idols preventing you from experiencing the fullness of Christ. Don’t allow the laws of affirmations steal the glory of the Lord. Allow your life to a witness of Jesus and not false predictions led by parental beliefs, life scars or fears.
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